Being single isn’t so bad!! ;)

After recently being single, I’ve realised that after three years of being in a relationship, I’m really happy and you should be too. If you’ve come out of a relationship, don’t dwell on it. Yes, it’ll hurt in the beginning, but shortly after, I’ve managed to really enjoy my life again. I’m focussed on my life and doing what makes me happy. Sometimes a relationship can stop you from doing what you truly want to do. I may be just a simple supervisor in a retail chain, but I make my life as interesting every day. I enjoy losing myself in music and being in the gym. I urge you to find what makes you happy, because it’s what’s important in life.
On the other hand, I went on a date recently, it’s my luck that he lives quite a way away from me, but he was the perfect guy, everything I looked for in a guy, it was him. Looks wise, spot on, I was thinking…. “Is this really happening?” But it was one of those things that was really unexpected. It’s awesome to know that these random things happen to you when you’re single!

You get good luck when you’re single! I swear! I have!! Haha! My tweet was recently featured in Attitude Magazine! I was like WOW! My favourite magazine has published it! Plus some other nice things happening! Makes me appreciate what life has to offer!

If you are single, please enjoy life…… Don’t give up and saying things like “No-one is ever going to love me” IT’S NOT TRUE!! Enjoy making connections/friends/dates first, because maybe one day, your perfect guy/girl will walk into your life unexpectedly and it will be amazing!! I’m waiting for the perfect guy! One day he’ll come, but now, I’m having a party being single, it’s great!

Go on! Party on!

Blogger Adam

Partners……

Ok, another blog! But want some advice……

I wonder, does anyone else experience the fear of telling your partner problems that you have about them?
It’s something I do struggle with sometimes. I do love him, but there’s so much that annoys me and frustrates me about him. I’m we seem to argue a lot recently, but his mood swings are terrible. It’s what makes him lash out verbally and I’ve done nothing wrong to start this. Something so small and insignificant can sometimes set it off, I was on the verge on breaking up with him the other day. I kinda wonder if it’s because he’s depressed.

I feel like I do everything for him. He doesn’t work, he’s claiming ESA, but can sometimes be really careless with his money. I work a 32-45 hour week. I pay the rent, because he lives with me and has no extra cash to pay for anything. I generally get the food shopping and buy anything extra. He buys shopping, but doesn’t buy always the right things. He’ll buy crap that we don’t need. He sometimes, buys more of one thing and spends loads. I look at what he buys and it’s not essentials, I have a job and I only buy essentials.

He lives with me free of charge. I pay the rent, as I am only paying a small amount for my room. He travelled over 200 miles to be with me, so having a break, is out of the question, especially if he can’t travel home.

I guess I’m really confused as to what I want to do in life. I don’t ever want to lose him, he’s the only guy that’s ever loved me for who I am (and he’s not even my first boyfriend!) I feel such a strong connection to him, yet on the other hand, I can’t stand living with him. In the 2 years we’ve nearly been together, he’s never made me breakfast in bed 😦 I have always made him breakfast and other meals! otherwise he doesn’t eat. Yet another reason for my struggle. He doesn’t eat, unless I’m home to cook for him. He used to be great at the start of our relationship, but the past 5 months, it’s seems like I work, cook and buy most things, yet, he’s not respnsipble with his money.

I’m finding it really hard to figure out what I want from this. I’m constantly in 2 minds about him, literally sat on the fence, wondering what to do. He’s often shown signs of manipulation towards me, which I knew but reacted back appropriately.
So these are my thoughts typed out, something I’ve wanted to say top a friend but don’t have anyone close enough that I can personally share this. There are many more things that have happened but can’t think of them.
So I hope that I’m not the only person that this is happening to, ideas and advice are welcome. I guess it shows how strong love is after all.

Blogger Adam

Adam’s Story (2)

*Warning you may find this post upsetting*

Growing up with a different dad was a tough one. I wanted to feel loved from both parents, but felt lonely and hurt and here’s why…..

My real dad left when I was 3.My brothers dad got with my mum shortly after. He was ok towards me until his son was born, my brother. Not long after, he started acting strangely. As the weeks, months, years went on he became more and more violent towards me. It got to the point where I was petrified of my family and he became manipulative and scary.

The violence started with the odd shouting at me. I wasn’t doing anything wrong, he really hated me. It then went on to sharp jabs to my chest and face, then went on to spitting on me. The worse it got to, was literally dragging me upstairs by one ankle so my face was bashing against each step, then he threw me on the bed. I was not a naughty child at all. I was always on my best behaviour, especially with him at home. I never even wanted to be a naughty kid.

I wanted to tell my mum everything that had happened. This violence was all happening when my mum was at work. She knew nothing. He made me so scared, that he never let me even sit near my mother on the sofa. Every time I did, he gave me such an evil stare, that I went and sat elsewhere immediately.

So this happened for a few years and it affected my school life. I was scared of everyone around me. I would never ask for help, because I couldn’t speak to anyone, because I’d think that he would be nearby.

So then one day, my mum came home early from work and when she walked into the front room, she caught him almost laying a fist into me, stopped him and immediately screamed at him to stop. He did and I ran upstairs and went into my room. I heard shouting from my mum downstairs and things were being thrown. A few hours later my mum came in to tell me that he was leaving and was never returning. I felt so happy and free from him.

I went on to tell my mum everything. Even to this day she still feels guilty for everything, but always keep reminding her that she couldn’t do anything about it. Parental bullying can leave scars, but I am not afraid anymore. I have rarely seen him since and I have got stronger in myself. It’s worth telling someone. They might just save your life, don’t wait for something to happen.
Adam

 Places to turn to for help with this type of problem or domestic violence in general:

 Child Line – http://www.childline.org.uk

Broken Rainbow – http://www.brokenrainbow.org.uk  (helpline for LGBTQ people facing domestic violence)

MK Act http://www.mkweb.co.uk/mkwomensaid (women’s Domestic Violence Crisis Intervention Service)